Dear Carrie

Dec 20, 2023 | 11:55 AM

“The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the position of Pattison Media and this site.”

Dear Carrie,

I’m 23, and I’m overwhelmed with stress and anxiety.

I finished a marketing degree during the pandemic. But my relationship ended, I couldn’t find work, and I had to give up my apartment and move back in with my parents.

I see people my age living in mansions with cool careers, and I don’t even know how I’m going to earn money or move out of my parents. I wake up stressed and go to bed stressed.

I have no idea know what my future looks like, or even what the future of the world is! I know lots of people my age are even scared to have babies, because they don’t want to bring them up with climate change and wars and everything that’s going on.

I saw your article randomly one day and thought maybe you might have something helpful for me.

Signed, Stressed Gen Z

Dear Stressed Gen Z,

Focus on gratitude for the fact that your parents are loving and generous enough to help you through this time. I know it feels like a major blow to the ego, having to return to your childhood bedroom – but if you didn’t have your parents…what other options do you have??

Most societies around the world embraced communal and family living – it’s only in recent years that humans have moved towards single family households.

Try to enjoy the upsides of family living – such as home cooked meals, time to learn from your parents, and (most importantly) no creepy roommates! Make contributions to the household where you can. You’ll feel better mentally if you’re helping with housework and meals, while at the same time building useful skills needed to manage a household.

If your parents are simply intolerable, then you need to accept the sacrifice for the time being, and strategize a plan for independence.

There’s a show on Netflix called “Your Rich Life.” Ramit Sethi, a financial guru, shares great advice that helps you take a hard look at your financial reality, and come up with a plan to get where you want in life. I found the series helpful and inspiring – check it out, and get ridiculously serious about your financial plan. Money is meant to be fun – but you have to learn to control it, and not vice versa.

Once you reframe your mindset about living with your folks, and figure out a financial plan, the next thing you should do is to avoid the comparison trap! Focus on yourself and the good things in your life.

What you see on social media is curated by an algorithm designed to feed you content meant for one purpose, and one purpose only: to keep you scrolling. Social media pages are an echo chamber, and not reliable sources of any kind of information; it’s all blown out of proportion and distorted.

Plus, the human body wasn’t designed to live through a screen; the constant flood of media and “short form” content takes a major toll on the nervous system.

Learn to become a conscious content creator, and otherwise – stay away from the scroll. Social media is a great business tool and a good place to connect with international friends – but it’s not a real place, to offer real experiences. Using social media platforms as a thermometer for success is a sure-fire recipe for anxiety and self-doubt.

If you’re living through your screen – your mental health will deteriorate. Simple as that.

And look, Dear Gen Z – there’s no doubt that there are innumerable issues pressing on your generation; the times are unprecedented and unpredictable.

But there’s plenty of good things happening in the world that we need to focus on.

Things have never been better in terms of human rights and gender equality (did you know that until the 1980s in Canada, women needed a man to sign for her to have a credit card?!); infant and maternal death rates are the lowest they’ve been in the history of the world; and advances in science and technology let us live more meaningful and longer lives. I mean – just less than a hundred years ago, there was no such thing as child labour laws, and having diabetes was a guaranteed death sentence!

People the world over are doing so many wonderful things and making serious contributions to the planet and mankind; make an effort to seek the positive. Try starting your day off by checking out the Good News Network here http://goodnewsnetwork.org, to see some amazing things happening the world over. Avoid TikTok and other short form content like the plague, especially in the morning.

It sounds like you have supportive and loving parents – lean into that, and use this time as an opportunity to discover what you want out of life, and what you want to contribute to the world. Then go for it fearlessly.

In case you haven’t heard it lately – I believe in you.

With love,

Carrie

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