By Merle Lee Ann Pratt

Seniors Scene

Something to Think About – The Final Steps

Mar 27, 2025 | 10:37 AM

The views and opinions expressed in this editorial are those of the writer’s and do not necessarily reflect the views or positions of Pattison Media.

Most of us have heard the song, “The Next 30 Years” by Tim McGraw. It is a song about reaching the age of 30 and looking at what his next 30 years in life will look like. This blog is about the latter part of life. A lot of us don’t think about the last few years of our aging lives or what it will look like.

With housing becoming more and more expensive, inflation, rising costs of everything we consume, families are going back to thinking more about grandparent suites and the lack of proper health care for our seniors.

Even adult children are coming home to stay due to the crazy costs of living and other various reasons; some of those being to help with family.

I have had my eyes opened with having to place my father in a nursing home. I always thought he would just pass away on the farm one day. But life had a different fate for him.

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What we thought would be a three to five day stay in a hospital turned into six weeks and then the nursing home. We still had hope he would get home while he was in the hospital. Within a few short days of being placed in a nursing home his health deteriorated very quickly.

If I could turn back time, dad’s end of life would look much different. Our nursing homes are under-staffed for the amount of care that most seniors require when they get admitted to these homes. Misinformation about the patient doesn’t help either.

My father could still walk a bit with a walker when he was transferred to the nursing home. Yet, somehow some of the staff were under the assumption that he couldn’t walk and would move him with a lift only. Already being weak with limited ability to walk – it didn’t take long to not be able to walk anymore. No physiotherapy, very few attendants getting him to walk, confinement was to a wheelchair. You can order a wheelchair, but they aren’t available for several weeks. Each chair is fitted for each individual.

My father wanted to get out of bed on his own. Staff can’t be with someone all the time – nor can family. In the hospital they can use restraints, but not in the home. A restraint has to be ordered by a doctor. We phoned the doctor – nope a form has to be faxed to him from the home.

So, no restraint ever arrived. It would have been nice to have a stomach restraint so he couldn’t get out of bed. So, over a two-week period my father fell six to eight times. He never broke bones except maybe a rib or two but he was black and blue all over his face and body. Well, he doesn’t walk or talk anymore. His heart is frail and doesn’t respond to medication. Now we sit and wait and hope for a peaceful ending to such a well lived long life. I always knew a nursing home would kill him and it will.

My family has been as supportive as they can with various family members being with him every day in the home, not taking shifts but trying not to overlap too much.

He has a television, and we keep it on Country Classics, so he has something to listen to and maybe helps him to stay relaxed.

The lights are too bright in his room to maintain a relaxing calm environment. He is on oxygen and the machine is very noisy and creates a lot of heat in a room that is already hot.

He is in a west facing window and old registers that are constantly putting out some heat. You can’t really leave his door open as there is a lot of ruckus and noise going on out there most of the time. There is not much for plug-ins but I have to find a lamp and bring it in for him.

But really these are common sense issues that the home should provide. And after mentioning a lamp one of the night nurses found me one. No more bright night light!

And like all professions, my father has had some exceptional care from compassionate and caring nurses and care aids. A snack tray was brought in for the family, some nurses emphasized to make sure you ring if your father needs anything. All we need now is for him to be as comfortable as possible.

My children are planning to make sure my end of life is different from my father’s. I hope they are successful. The preparation of a guest / senior suite is being looked into. And I will make sure I have clear instructions for a way to die with dignity.

Where does society go from here? What can we do to help seniors leave this world in a more humane way.

End-of-life care is a critical issue that many families face, often without sufficient preparation or support. The experience with my father highlighted the urgent need for improvements in our healthcare system, particularly in facilities dedicated to the elderly.

Families are forced to navigate a complex web of paperwork, medical protocols, and care plans, often with little guidance. The emotional toll is immense, compounded by the physical decline of a loved one. It is a stark reminder that our society must prioritize the dignity and quality of life for our seniors.

Moreover, there needs to be a greater emphasis on training and support for the staff in nursing homes. They are often overworked and under-resourced, which can lead to mistakes and oversights that significantly affect the well-being of residents.

We must advocate for policies that ensure adequate staffing levels, better training, and timely access to necessary medical equipment and support services. It is essential to create an environment where our loved ones receive the compassionate and comprehensive care they deserve in their final days.

As we look toward the future, it is clear that this issue will only grow more pressing. We owe it to our seniors to ensure that their final years are spent in comfort and with respect. It is time for a collective effort to transform end-of-life care from a burdensome ordeal to a period of peace and dignity.

If you have a family member aging or yourself, make sure you have given it some thought before you are placed in the situation of making decisions you haven’t thought about with family members.

And the song for today’s blog is “Silver Wings” by Merle Haggard and The Strangers. This song is one of the most beloved in Haggard and The Strangers discography. The song is simple, but it expresses Haggard’s emotional expression in grieving a loved one. I hope my dad is flying on silver wings soon.

Merle Lee Ann Pratt – merleleeannskitchen.com

Email: merleleeann@gmail.com – YouTube: @merleleeannskitchen

Note: Parts of this article were written with help from Co-Pilot (AI).

This column is sponsored by MacKenzie Funeral Chapel and Crematorium – We will be there when you need us.

130 9th St. E, Prince Albert, SK

Phone: (306) 763-8488 – https://mackenziechapel.ca